Part of learning how to manage anger is accepting that we will get angry. That anger is OK and even healthy! Anger can signal that something is wrong, and needs to get fixed. But anger can cause bigger problems. That's when the FEELING anger (which is ok) gets expressed in harmful BEHAVIORS (not ok).
As we adapt to living together in close quarters, our families may deal with more anger. It is helpful to set up clear boundaries around what is and is not ok when it comes to expressing anger. That's where in therapy I love to teach families the simple but powerful guidelines called "The Anger Rules". The Anger Rules provides space to feel and express anger, but it also protects us from harmful behaviors. Through establishing clear ground rules about what's not OK in your home, you also teach what is healthy and helpful. This sets the foundation for healthy emotional expression where people can move through their upset feelings without hurting themselves or others.
4 Steps to take to establish safe boundaries around expressing anger in healthy ways:
Having a plan about how to handle anger promotes healthy emotional regulation skills. It also promotes safety. We are going to have Big Feelings, it helps to have a plan to know how to handle them so we can feel better, not stuck. If you're interested in more ways to handle Big Feelings, check out my Toolkit for Helping Your Child Manage Big Feelings.